Pregnancy Story

A few people have asked for my pregnancy story, so here it is…
When a man and a woman fall in love…
Alright, just kidding!
This is the day I found out I was knocked up.
I found out about an hour before the shower.  I sat there with these lovely ladies and tried to act normal while I digested the news.  I later learned that Tara was onto me and told Mr. FBE immediately after that she was sure I was preggers.  Apparently the 12 bathroom breaks gave me away.
Let’s rewind.
The night before I had coordinated the biggest wedding my company has handled to date.  We were very busy, but I couldn’t help notice that something was off with me.  I was short of breath and very tired.  I was five days late, but that wasn’t out of the norm for me.  Regardless, I decided I would take a test in the morning.
The next morning I woke up early and googled the top rated pregnancy tests.  I reasoned that if I was going to spend money on a pee stick, it’d better be the best kind.  After making a selection, I started the trip to the drug store.  By the time I made it home, I had convinced myself that I had just wasted $15, because there was no way I was pregnant.
I got home, carefully read the instructions, and took the test.  I nervously sat it on the counter while I attempted to fix the broken soap dispenser.  After about 10 seconds, I looked down and saw the word, “pregnant.”  I sat in shock for a couple minutes, then I retrieved my Kindle and downloaded “What to Expect,” so I could figure out what to do next.
One of the first chapters included instructions on taking a pregnancy test.  I noticed that I took the test differently than the book instructed.  I began to panic, “What if I took it wrong?!  I have a college degree, I’ll be darned if I fail a pregnancy test!
I took the test again and the results were returned again in record time.
I took a picture of the test on my phone, as proof for myself, since I was in such shock.  Then I ran out the door to the shower.  While I was there, Michelle asked to see pictures from the wedding I’d coordinated.  I fumbled to erase the picture before she or anyone else saw.
On the way home, I called Mr. BUB, who was almost home from out of town.  “I have a surprise for you- I made you something!
As it turns out, Mr. BUB knew right then what was going on.  He even searched the trash cans for an empty EPT box before I got home.  He didn’t find any.  It was cleverly hidden in my bathroom vanity.
I arrived home, ordered him to turn the tv off, and showed him the test.  He grinned and asked, “What does this mean?

I laughed, “Um, that we’re having a baby.  There’s a baby in there!