{Skeeter}
Me: I can’t believe I made this…
Mr. BUB: I know she’s pretty awesome.
Me: I mean, all by myself.
Mr. BUB: I’m pretty sure I had a part in that…
Me: Yeah, a small part. I did all the real work.
{Arguing}
Mr. BUB: Dinner is really good.
Me (fuming): Good.
Mr. BUB: Is mine poisoned?
Me: I haven’t signed that life insurance policy yet.
Mr. BUB: That’s right. I can feel safe until then.
{Girls’ Fantasy Football League}
Me: We need an eighth player.
Mr. BUB: I’ll play!
Me: I’m so going to beat you.
Mr. BUB: Actually, I’m not going to play. If I lost to one of you, I’d be inconsolable.
Me: We need an eighth player.
Mr. BUB: I’ll play!
Me: I’m so going to beat you.
Mr. BUB: Actually, I’m not going to play. If I lost to one of you, I’d be inconsolable.
{Sleepy Skeeter}
Mr. BUB: Look! She’s rubbing her eyes, just like a real person!
Me: Uh…she is a real person.
Mr. BUB: You know what I meant.
Me: …not really…
