Life With the BUBs

Me:  I can’t believe I made this…
Mr. BUB:  I know she’s pretty awesome.
Me:  I mean, all by myself.
Mr. BUB:  I’m pretty sure I had a part in that…
Me:  Yeah, a small part.  I did all the real work.
Mr. BUB:  Dinner is really good.
Me (fuming):  Good.
Mr. BUB:  Is mine poisoned?
Me:  I haven’t signed that life insurance policy yet.
Mr. BUB:  That’s right.  I can feel safe until then.
 {Girls’ Fantasy Football League}
Me:  We need an eighth player.
Mr. BUB:  I’ll play!
Me:  I’m so going to beat you.
Mr. BUB:  Actually, I’m not going to play.  If I lost to one of you, I’d be inconsolable.

{Sleepy Skeeter}
Mr. BUB:  Look!  She’s rubbing her eyes, just like a real person!
Me: Uh…she is a real person.
Mr. BUB:  You know what I meant.
Me:  …not really…