Thursday, May 10, 2012

Only Child.

I intended to never share this story, for obvious reasons.  But I've seen a lot of bloggers come clean lately, so I'm sharing my story in solidarity.

Pregnancy changes everything- a polite girl that once never burped can outburp the best of them.  And the girl that is mortified at the thought of passing gas in front of her husband, well- it happens.

It started out like any other evening.  Mr. BUB and I were laying on the couch- my swollen feet propped up, when I felt the urge to pee for the thousandth time that day.  That's what happens with a baby tap dancing on your bladder.

It took a lot more effort to haul myself off the couch than normal.  And apparently the effort is what made it happen.

I froze.

Then I did what any self respecting woman would do.  I looked at the dog laying on the floor and said "Did you hear that?!  Hank has some terrible gas."

Then, as I started to walk towards the ladies' room, I noticed Mr. BUB's mouth twitching.  "Yeah, we may need to change his food or something," he responded, trying not to laugh.

"Yeah, I'll look into that," I responded, thankful he's at least going to play along.

Now laughing he said, "You're really going to let poor Hank take the blame?"

"That's it- Skeeter is an only child!"  I pouted and demanded we never speak of this moment again.

So there you have it.  The swollen feet wouldn't scare me away from another pregnancy.  Nor would the extended hospital stay & preclampsia.  But gas?  Absolutely.

...And let's not discuss what an epidural does to the whole gas issue.

20 comments:

Jenn said...

hehe, thank you for sharing...at least now I know some of the things to expect whenever I'm "with baby" haha
(my boyfriend blames my dog for all of his farts, too....no worries haha)

Meghan @ Shine On said...

You make me laugh... We talk about this topic often at work. I have a total complex about it, so I have no idea how I'm going to live with someone. Ha!

xox!

Di said...

Ahh - pregnancy gas. I remember buying Gas X. Being thankful no one was in the office or car with me half the time and yes - blaming the dog! :)

Kelly Marie said...

hahah I wish Ryan and I cared more about keeping that away from each other. We're both too comfortable with it at times.

Myra said...

Hahahaha. OH lawdy. Hearing all these things makes me glad I will know all the things to look forward to when we decide to have a little nugget. Good thing Kobi will be around to take the blame ;)

Mateya said...

Too funny! We've never been too shy about that but pregnancy has brought it to a whole new level. I almost feel bad. I hope my husband still finds me attractive after all of this haha!

Monica's Notebook said...

Bahahaha! Omg this is so funny! i wouldve done the SAME EXACT thing!

Krystal said...

We blame the dog for farts all the time that whenever he is around and hears a fart he puts his head toward the ground and walks off! It's hilarious.

The Nerdy Katie said...

J had never ever heard me pass gas until I got pregnant. Then all bets were off. At least you could control your bladder!

Meg O. said...

Oh my goodness. The burps, the gas.... the HORROR! I think it's perfectly okay to blame it on Hank. You seriously crack me up.

Katie said...

Ohhh the beauty of pregnancy! And I have to say it didn't end when we left the hospital...what's sexier than a woman hooked up to a double breast pump?? Lol...Rob has never been more attracted to me ;)

Katie said...

Awww! Poor thing! Thankfully or not, husband and I have no problems laying it all out there with each other. Do I love when he rips one and we're stuck in a car together? Absolutely not, but then if I accidentally do it, it's not that big a deal. He mocks me of course, but at this point I could care less. We all know he's way worse. The sad part is, our dogs EASILY have the worst farts in the whole family, and they are frequent. I actually think it is their food- LOL - but it helps with allergies, so we deal with it.
This sounded better in my head...

Michelle @ The Vintage Apple said...

Oh no. LOL!!!!!!! So this will happen to me one day?!?!?!

Amber said...

Hahaha, oh God! This happens more when you're pregnant?! I am never having children!

Katie said...

Oh gosh this is hilarious-- one of my biggest fears in life is letting one rip in front of Donny... Lol!!!

Jessica Renee said...

haha You're too funny!!! It's pretty bad that Ronnie and I are so comfortable with that stuff but it only got worse during pregnancy!!

tara said...

EW.

Megan said...

Hahahaha. Oh my gosh, this made me bust out laughing!!!

Wiz said...

Hahaha! I so remember having visitors shortly after Colt was born and I couldn't control the gas. All I could do was shrug and say "sorry, cant help it." So funny!

Crazy Shenanigans-JMO said...

Haha! We use to be like that but now we've become so overly comfortable that when it just happens we ignore them lol

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