Thursday, May 3, 2012

Life With the BUBs

{Maternity Clothes- a few weeks ago}
Me:  I'm still wearing my maternity jeans, because I'm afraid my normal jeans will touch my incision.
Mr. BUB:  And because they're the most comfortable thing you've ever worn?
Me:  Yes.  I'm considering getting knocked up again right now, just so I can legitimately wear them 9 more months...
Mr. BUB:  Um, what?!

{Bugs}
Me:  We have to move.
Mr. BUB:  Why?
Me:  I found a tiny dead roach yesterday.
Mr. BUB:  Okay...
Me:  And I found a giant spider today.
Mr. BUB (pulling out his knife):  Where?  Did you kill it?!

{50 Shades of Gray}
Me: Tara is trying to get people to peer pressure me to read the last two books.
Mr. BUB:  Are they all porn obsessed desperate housewives?

{Hospital Bills}
Me:  Guess how much my hospital bill is before insurance.
Mr. BUB: $20,000?
Me:  Nope.
Mr. BUB: $40,000?
Me: Nope.
Mr. BUB:  FIFTY THOUSAND?!  
Me:  $53,000
Mr. BUB: Holy crap, if we'd actually had to pay that, you'd never see me again.  I'd run off into the woods, smear myself in mud & shit and live off of bugs & berries the rest of my life.

30 comments:

Nikki said...

Where in the world does he come up with this stuff? Hysterical!

Sara said...

You guys have the best convos!! Wait till the NICU bills come. We just got a random one 10 months later! Ugh. I loved telling Erin our before insurance costs.

Tea said...

You two crack me up! I LOVE the "Life with bubs" posts! Probably my favorites!

star said...

My maternity jeans are super comfy! I love them! Girl, $53,000 hospital bill?? You are scaring me! I hope you have excellent insurance and not pay most of that!

Michelle (michabella) said...

Hehehe love these posts.... and really.... he'd smear himself in mud and shit?? wow.... Well, at least you'll know where to find him!

Megan said...

These are great! I love y'alls convos.

tara said...

You better keep reading that trilogy, you dirty hooker!

Mateya said...

Haha! I love the Hunger Games comment...smart man :)

daniela said...

These were all hilar! I would leave for a roach but not a spider, c'mon! haha
Also LOL Mr BUB @ the porn-obsessed DHs!

And I cannot believe your hospital bill! I'm glad it's covered!! :)

Katie said...

You guys are too funny! So did the $53,000 bill make you rethink the getting knocked up again idea? It's ridiculous how much it costs to deliver a child! Nevermind all the pregnancy stuff and raising them for a couple decades!!!

Jessica Renee said...

bahaha So funny! I love the last one especially, I can definitely relate to that! Have you seen your NICU bill yet? Yikes!

lil desiqua said...

Haha! I love when you do these- hilarious! I'm still on the fence about reading those books!

Domesticated-Bliss said...

You DO need to read the other 2 50 Shades books - they're less "porn-filled" and more emotional :) I agree with Tara! And $53,000??????? I'd have to agree with Mr. BUB if I had to pay that bill :)

Katie said...

Ha! Love that you record these hilarious conversations.

I so miss maternity pants! Why do normal pants even have zippers and buttons? So uncomfortable now that I know better! ;)

And I'm with Mr. BUB on the hospital bills...OUCH. PTL for insurance!

Christianna said...

Hahahahahaha, you guys have the best convos on the planet!

Jeremy and Megan said...

I didn't want to give up my maternity jeans either!!! SO comfy!! LOVED them!! :)

Jules said...

run away over the hospital bill by covering up with shit. I think I'd plan my run away a lot less smelly.

Jules said...

run away over the hospital bill by covering up with shit. I think I'd plan my run away a lot less smelly.

Amanda said...

Oh Mr. BUB! Your interactions are priceless, simply priceless :)

Cole said...

You legitimately have the funniest husband ever!

Michelle @ The Vintage Apple said...

This is by far one of my most favorite things to read on your blog! And, excuse me while I barf at how much it costs to have a baby! HOLY Guacamole! And I would totally move out if I found a tiny roach. They are disgusting and put here on this Earth to make me sick. That is all. Hearts!!!!!

Di said...

Wait until you see the NICU bill. I about had a heart attack when I saw Jellybean's before insurance!

Katie said...

$53k?? Holy crap. And if I found two bugs in a day, I'd say the same thing-- we're outta here!! Lol

Amanda Faith said...

I love reading halls conversations. :)

Teale's first few days in the nicu was $12,000+ some change.. yeah we're going on day 41 in the nicu, yikes!

Christine said...

hahahaha! love it! especially your husband's last comment about running off into the woods. because everyone knows in order to run off into the woods you need to smear yourself in "mud & shit". :)

Fried Pink Tomato said...

He is hysterical! It is pretty incredible how much medical bills add up!

Megan said...

Ughhhh, hospital bills are ridiculous! Thank the Lord for insurance!!

Emily said...

The hospital bill reaction sounds like something my hubs would say...and I would be pulling out a knife over the spider. I totally woke hubs up at like 1AM bc one was crawling around and I made him come kill it

Meghan @ Shine On said...

These are always my favorite posts!!! Crack me up!

Crazy Shenanigans-JMO said...

I hate to add to the pressure but you should totally read the 2nd book in the trilogy. I thought it was even better than the first!

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